Loneliness in Suffering: Psalm 142

Loneliness in Suffering

Psalm 142

Suffering is a wilderness experience. We feel very much alone and helpless, cut off from others who cannot know how we suffer. We long for someone to come to our aid, be “company” for us, get us out of this. Someone will. Some One will certainly come to our aid. He will be company for us if we’ll let Him. But get us out of it? Not necessarily.

Elisabeth Elliot

Loneliness. The word itself ushers in a sense of bleakness and desolation. Being without companionship. Feeling cut off from others. Having no meaningful relationships. Or perhaps the loss of someone dear and close leaves an emptiness no one else can fill. Suffering can bring its own sense of loneliness as it can seem, and may even be true, that no one can truly understand what we are experiencing and enduring with all its complexities and intricacies. David, here in Psalm 142, sits in a cave hiding from his enemies, and he says, “there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul.” Has your suffering ever caused you to feel that way and think those thoughts? When left with no one and nothing, where do you turn? To whom do you go for solace?

David, in his suffering and loneliness, leaned into the presence of God.

A Merciful, Personal God

David knew in his troubles God is near and hears his cry for help (142:1-2). When things seemed bleak and wearying, David poured out his complaint before the Lord. He enumerated his troubles before Him. The anguish he felt, the distress of the situation, the pain and grief he was experiencing. All of it he expressed to the Lord. “David knows the value of refusing to relapse into silence. That way lies despair” (Kidner). In our loneliness, we too must continue to cry out to God and not fall silent. When it may seem that no answer comes, or things may never change, we must press on in hope and continue to offer up our supplications to the Lord.

One point of communicating our situation to another person is so that they will understand what we are thinking or feeling. However, there is a limit to the understanding another person can have. No one can know the mind of someone else completely. Nor can they step into your soul and understand the depths of emotions and the reasons for those emotions. Not in a complete sense. But our Lord can. His understanding is infinite (Psalm 147:5). And that understanding includes our suffering and our soul.

Confident in God’s perfect understanding, David writes this very personal psalm. David uses 29 personal pronouns. He expresses, “My God hears my complaint and knows my trouble. He knows my way, and when no one else cares for my soul, He is my refuge, my portion, and my strength.” We need that same confidence in the nearness and tender care of our Lord. Like David, we must pour out our troubles and receive comfort in knowing that our Lord is both sympathetic and faithful in the midst of our current troubles.

You Know My Way

David rested in the Lord knowing that He knew his way and the effect his troubles had on him internally (142:3-4). David’s suffering had overwhelmed his soul. His spirit was faint within him. He lacked the courage and strength within himself to meet the challenges before him. His enemies had hidden traps for him. And he felt utterly alone. When I read these verses, I hear the desperation. He cries out for the Lord to look and see. To notice that, for David, there was no one, no safe place, nothing, except the enemies’ traps. Our way, the path where we are currently walking, may be a part of our path that takes us through the valley, through the darkness, through a wilderness experience. The path of suffering can be isolating. We may not really be alone, but we may feel alone. Yet the Scripture reminds us that even in the valley of the shadow of death, our Shepherd is with us. And Our Savior, the great shepherd of our soul, understands aloneness. “In the garden, Jesus found himself alone. With God. Just like we are. In the end, we are all left alone with God” (Risner). David, too, was left alone with God, but it causes him to recognize that while it seemed that no refuge remained for him, in fact, the only Refuge that mattered was right there with him.

My Refuge, My Portion, My Strength

Like many lament psalms, after the complaint is poured out to the Lord, the psalm ends in a word of hope. Here, David drew near to the Lord as his refuge, portion, and strength. For David, God’s presence was never so much needed as it was now, in the cave, where no one else cared for his soul and none took notice of him. And God was his refuge. God was his protection and security. God was his portion. Though he was bereft of all other comforts and companions, he had all he needed in the Lord.

Though he was brought very low and he felt very weak, he knew his loneliness would not last forever. He ends the psalm by saying, “The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me” (142:7). His aloneness would be replaced by a host of the righteous. Being brought low would be exchanged for bountifulness and plenty. Was David certain he would experience that great exchange on this side of eternity? I’m not sure. Are we guaranteed the exchange of loneliness for a host of friends or the exchange of suffering for care-free living? Not here, though God may choose in His will to give us faithful brothers and sisters in Christ, and He may choose to relieve our suffering and loneliness. But we know with all assurance that the “sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us” (Romans‬ ‭8‬:‭18). A greater day is coming. On that day, we will never be lonely and we will never suffer again. We will be surrounded by the host of the righteous whose sufferings in this life have produced for them an eternal weight of glory far behind all comparison. Our earthly bodies, subject to being faint, brought low, and troubled, will be changed and finally free and made like Christ’s glorious body. On that day and for all eternity, we will be filled with joy and rejoicing with the company of the saints in the presence of our Savior.

Let us press forward, then, in suffering and loneliness, to find our true refuge and portion in the Lord alone. He will satisfy as nothing and no one else can. He is near, even in our loneliest moments.

142:1-2 With my voice I cry out to the Lord; with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord. I pour out my complaint before him; I tell my trouble before him.

Lord, I pray:

▫️Begin by pouring out your complaint and trouble to the Lord. What hardships are you facing? What relationships are causing you sorrow? Is there an illness that continues to weigh you down? Are you experiencing loneliness?

▫️You would have mercy on me today. There are aspects of this suffering that make me feel very alone. I know others have suffered in a similar way, and others suffer more than I, but my suffering is my own. You are governing me and this suffering and loneliness in Your sovereignty. Help me to trust Your good purposes in this.

142:3-4 When my spirit faints within me, you know my way! In the path where I walk they have hidden a trap for me. Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul.

Lord, I pray:

▫️“Calm this perturbed mind. Tranquilize this ruffled spirit. Bind up this bruised and broken heart. Say to these troubled waters in which I wade, ‘Peace, be still.’ Jesus, I throw myself upon Your gentle bosom. To whom can I, to whom would I, tell my grief, to whom unveil my sorrow, but to You? Lord, it is too tender for any eye, too deep for any hand, but Yours. I bless You that I am shut up to You, my God.” -Octavius Winslow

▫️My spirit is overwhelmed within me, but You know all the details of _________. You know the path I am on. You know the way in which I walk. And You are right here with me. You have promised to never leave me nor forsake me. As I walk this path, help me to lean into Your presence and nearness. When I feel that there is none who takes notice of me and no one who cares for my soul, remind me that You take notice and You care so I can cast all my cares on You.

142:5-7 I cry to you, O Lord; I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.” Attend to my cry, for I am brought very low! Deliver me from my persecutors, for they are too strong for me! Bring me out of prison, that I may give thanks to your name! The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me.

‭‭Lord, I pray:

▫️Be my refuge, the strong tower, to which I flee each day. When loneliness weighs heavily on me, strengthen me to run to You and Your Word and to remind my own soul to “Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him for the help of His presence” (Psalm 42:5 NASBS).

▫️Shepherd of my soul, attend to my cry, for I am brought very low! My situation seems too strong for me. I need Your almighty power to intervene in the situation and also strengthen me to walk in obedience to You. Bring me out of this prison, that I may give thanks to Your name.

▫️Thank you for the hope of heaven. Thank you that a day is coming when suffering, pain, confusion, trouble, and loneliness will be no more. When I feel alone, remind me that loneliness is only temporary and I am truly never alone because You are always with me. In my dark days, I would feel the light of Your presence. I know You will deal bountifully with me.

May the Lord do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, for His glory and our good. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

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